/// waking up to...

this was a photo of me taken by camille last december 2007, the morning after young folks night. she labeled it as 

"waking up to sweden."

it is so easy to forget where you are now, and how you got there. i have almost forgotten how long the road was to get here and everything i did and how many difficult nights i've endured and how many papers i've filled out and how many essays i've written and how many taxi cabs i took and how many websites i've memorized and how many train rides i endured and how much i've waited and how much i've DONE. i've almost forgotten how brave i was. i've almost forgotten HOW i love you. 

i want to remember.

and the songs, and the dreams, and your words, but most importantly, MY OWN SELF brought me here. i am in an apartment in sodermalm, things beyond my imagination has happened over the past few months, and i believe there are more wonders waiting for me. i have been scared most of the time but a friend told me that being brave doesn't mean having no fears. it means that i am not letting those fears stop me. you are one of the most courageous persons i've met, she said. i am not so scared anymore. i am in an apartment in sodermalm, things beyond my imagination has happened over the past few months and i know there are more wonders waiting for me, for all of us. love, the kind we're dreaming of. 

i did wake up to sweden.